Brace Yourselves

Here's the thing about change, it happens whether we like it or not. That's not to say that we have no control of the things that change, I actually think we have quite a lot of say in that matter. However, there is no logic in denying that change, just happens. Lately I've been frustrated with many of my peers and here's why: I see and hear so many of us( yes I include myself in this) grumbling about things we want to change in our lives. Jobs, hair styles, quality of life, relationship status, good Lord that last one is hugely prevalent. In the past week, I've seen about six posts on various social medias including the phrases "being single sucks", "#toosingle", and "#ineedaman". No you frickin' don't! I am so irritated with people who define their happiness and worth by their relationship status. And that's coming from a girl who's been single for quite a few years. It's not like I'm happily committed and patronizing all you single folks, believe me, I get it. It gets lonely sometimes. You just want someone to cuddle with and to always be there for you and geek out over movies with you, but you know what? There is such a beauty to independence (I realize this is all opinion and maybe you disagree, if so go write a blog about, it's a lovely way to vent, but for now let me do my venting). Independence! I can't tell you how many people have told me, "Melissa, you're too independent..." I've even heard "You'll never get a man if you don't learn some dependence...", do you even hear yourselves people? Did it never occur to you that my main goal in life is not to find my "other half" or my "soulmate" or whatever other horseshit that society has convinced us we need? Because the idea that "I need to get a boyfriend" is completely outlandish and I may slap the next person who says it to me. As if I have somehow been slacking on that front, and boy I really need to hop to it or people will think that *gasp* I enjoy being single! This isn't Colonial America! Single twenty year olds are no longer considered "spinsters", it's OK to not have a boyfriend or girlfriend and like it. Now maybe I am completely cuckoo, and maybe I'm the only one who is happy in their singleness, and if so than I feel quite awkward, but I don't think I am the only one. I think that a lot of people are OK with being single but feel like maybe they shouldn't be quite so OK with it.
So I started by mentioning change did I not? Well here's where I tie that in and it's all very clever(not), twelve years ago, eight year old me was pretty sure she'd be married with a kid by now. She wanted to be a singer, but as any of my friends will tell you that is absolutely not in my future. She sure as hell didn't think that she'd be trying to move to Europe, and she certainly didn't think she'd be wasting time on a crappy, opinionated blog, and yet here I sit, spewing opinions left and right. My point is this; ninety nine point nine percent of us aren't who we thought we would be. Frankly, I'm supremely glad I'm not who eight year old me wanted to be, or even who eighteen year old me wanted to be. However, if you're unhappy with something in your life, stop posting about it on Instagram and Twitter, go do something about it. If it's your job, quit it, if it's your style, change it, if it's your church, try something new, don't like your hair? Cut it, it grows back, and it's fun, trust me. I realize it's easier to be so offhand with materialistic things, but if it is your relationship status that you find bothersome, I'd encourage you to stop looking at life as necessarily a two person or a couples adventure. Because I know I've learned the most about love when I've fallen out of it, and I've learned the most about being a friend or companion when I've been alone. Isn't that what life is about? Learning? You have one, beautiful shot at this life, don't spend it searching for someone to complete you, or a job that will make you happy or a style that will make others like you because you will miss so much. Do something crazy, go somewhere new, learn a new culture or language, all by yourself, make some memories that are just yours. That way when you finally meet someone you want to spend the remainder of your life with, you'll have a foundation of yourself to build a relationship off of. Because I am convinced that the search for your other half will leave you null and void. I plan to wait instead, for someone who will accompany me through this life as a friend and lover, not as someone to complete whatever is supposed to be missing from me. So tell me, what do you plan to do with your one, wild and precious life?

Hello Future

Bon Soir lovely people! So this is my blog. Welcome. The last time I blogged anything was in 2010. And that was just the pubescent whining of a 16 year old girl *disclaimer* this might be the more grown up whining of a 20 year old girl and might not actually be any better*disclaimer*. Now that we've got that settled, what are people blogging about these days? Politics? Relationships? Physics? Goodness knows I have little interest in any of those. But seriously, am I supposed to talk about my life? That does seem rather narcissistic. Perhaps I should start with a brief debriefing of who I actually am. Oh God, I've forgotten everything about myself, hang on...okay, I'm a 20 year old California native. I'm a waitress in a pizza joint which I will probably complain about at some point. I went to Butte College for a year and then dropped out since I hated it. Then, in a horribly cliched move of Fate, I decided to enroll in beauty school. Of course it's not just any beauty school, Heavens no! Delamar Academy is a special effects make up school and it's in London! So that makes it better?...Maybe...anyways now I am forced to admit to you that I am waiting tables to put myself through beauty school which sounds like the beginning of a terrible movie about a girl finding herself. I should point out that I am an incurable sarcastic and pessimist so if that bugs you, don't let the virtual door hit you on the way out. Now what was I saying? Ah yes, my no longer very brief debriefing, I honestly don't know what to tell you guys, I feel so terribly dull all of a sudden. Let's see, my favorite color is turquoise, my favorite actress is Audrey Hepburn, I love Indie music and I'm a HUGE nerd. Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Doctor Who, Monty Python, Sherlock, Merlin, Marvel Comics, Batman(did DC comics even do anything else??), I love sports and here are my teams: MLB: San Francisco Giants, NFL: San Diego Chargers( if you're a Raiders fan, go back and read the witty thing about the virtual door) and college basketball: Oregon Ducks(quack). I love summer, strawberries, and warm rain. I am most definitely a dog person and my dog Kenya is my soul mate. I am the klutz of the family, as well as the youngest, my only brother is 24 and he's pretty cool( Tommy if you read this by some weird chance, you're way cooler than "pretty cool" but I was trying to be cool, sorry) he lives in LA, and I still live at home( don't judge, London is damn expensive). My hobbies include, but are not limited to, writing, running, eating, reading, listening to music, drinking tea, playing dress up, spending Saturdays doing make up(and yes I mean the whole day), and spending time with my spectacular friends. I have a strange obsession with words(don't ask), I just find that they have a very subtle power and I love using the most peculiar words imaginable. I thrive on sarcasm and irony and if you can understand mine and use it yourself then we'll get along just fine. I feel like you might be losing interest, not that I blame you, everyone gets boring at some point. However if you are still interested in this mutilated blog and single, message me ;) just kidding ha ha, that was awkward sorry. You might be wondering why I decided to start a blog. The truth is I just had a lot on my mind and I felt like blogging might be a fun way to get some of that stuff out. You see recently with all this London planning I've gotten caught up in 113 days from now as opposed to right now. I hate to admit it but that is making my life exceptionally difficult. Not that it's bad to think about the future, it's just that I've been consumed by it lately. It's hard, to try and live in the present while trying to find a roommate and an apartment and apply for a visa. Not to mention I'm scared out of my mind. There I said it. I'm actually really scared. Don't get me wrong I cannot wait to do this, I am so very very excited, but it's really terrifying at the same time. I mean the longest I've been away from home and family was 2 weeks, and even then I was with friends. This is so different though, thousands of miles away in a different country, on my own with people I hardly know. Not your everyday situation. It's not that I'm scared to leave per say, I've traveled before and it's easily the best thing I have ever done. What really scares me is the possibility of failure. What if I get there and graduate and can't get a job? What if I don't even get there? And all this dreaming, this worrying is for naught? I know I'm probably over thinking a lot of it, and "it'll all be fine" and yes that's what I want to hear but I know it's not what I need to hear. I don't know if that makes any sense or if you can relate but who cares, it's my blog right? And if you're still reading than I guess it does make sense. I know that got kind of deep for a bit so thanks for bearing with me. I am so worried that I'm blogging the wrong way!! Is there even a right way to blog? I doubt it. Okay I think this is a wrap. I'm gonna go eat some strawberries and do the laundry I've put off for 3 hours. Thanks for reading, if you liked this say so! I'm very insecure, and if you didn't then don't say anything. Just kidding, just be nice about it. Goodnight darlings!